


blind dates

by Blue_Rive



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Briomartis is why we can't have nice things, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, M/M, Oneshot, except they're wingmen for litpollo instead of police, georgie and briomartis are like good cop and bad cop, georgie knows too much, this is so dumb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 06:07:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20466257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Rive/pseuds/Blue_Rive
Summary: this is a really dumb drabble. toa discord this is for you.





	blind dates

**Author's Note:**

> please don't take this as an example of all my work

Lityerses was used to dealing with crazy people. The emperor says some shit about combat ostriches and you bow and say ‘yes sir, whatever sir,’ and pray to the gods that one doesn’t bite your hand off. But this was weird even by his standards. 

“Okay, stand there,” Briomartis told him, balanced casually on a rafter. Lit tentatively moved to the side, stepping over a tripwire,  _ why was that there _ . “Wait, stop. I don’t want this going off before it’s time.”

Lit raised an eyebrow. “What’s going to go off? Uh, my lady.” 

“Oh, you’ll find out soon enough!”

That was not reassuring. Lit resolved to just… stay there. And hope nothing exploded. 

“He should be here any second now,” Briomartis said, sitting down on the rafter and summoning- was that popcorn?

“Who-” 

Apollo cautiously walked into the room. He noticed Lityerses and grinned.

“You’re actually here! I didn’t think you’d be!” 

Lit was pretty sure he was missing something. “Wait, who told you I’d be here? And aren’t you supposed to be fighting Python or something?”

“Briomartis said you wanted to go out with me- oh no.” He started to take a step forward. “Where is she?”

Lityerses jumped up. “No, stop, there’s a tripwi-”

The room exploded. 

\---

Lityerses came to a few minutes later. Georgina was sitting next to him, playing with a fidget spinner. 

“Oh, nice, you’re awake.”

“W-what  _ was  _ that?” He’d completely lost track of whatever was going on. Briomartis told him to wait in that room and then Apollo came in and wanted to go out with him, which was  _ amazing  _ but not relevant, and then. And then everything blew up.

“She likes pranks. Which is  _ annoying,  _ ‘cause she told me she was going to sincerely try to get you two together and then she  _ didn’t  _ and now I have to watch you be dumb for like, another  _ week. _ ”

Lityerses pushed himself up to his feet. “What?” 

“But it’s okay,” Georgina continued, “because Apollo got kinda exploded so now you can like go see him in the infirmary and it’ll be super romancy and then you’ll confess your love and then you’ll fu-”

Lit decided he needed to talk to Emmie and Jo about Georgie’s internet access. 

“I’m  _ not _ doing that.” Although, that did seem like a pretty good idea… but he’d learned his lesson about trusting anyone else to mess with his love life. One explosion was too many for any sane person. He could be cool and deal with Apollo himself. 

...how were you supposed to flirt when you couldn’t threaten to kill someone’s friends and family? 

Whatever. He’d figure it out.  _ Without  _ listening to Briomartis.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> comment/kudo/check out my actual good stuff please!


End file.
